Mamavation Monday: Not about Weight at All

Sorry girls, but today I won’t be talking about weight at all. I have to vent though, just because I am mildly freaked out and it makes me question a lot of things in my life. No, I am not getting divorced, my dog didn’t run off, and I am not seriously ill. This morning my 2.8 year old had evaluation by early intervention people and their founding left me shocked and confused at the same time.

My son is growing up in bi-lingual environment. For as long as I can remember here is all I hear: boys talk late, bi-lingual kids take longer to process languages, some kids are just late talkers. So how do you call a bi-lingual boy late-talker? (I kept waiting for him to start catching up). His testing reveled  70 percent speech delay!!! My almost 3 year old has speaking abilities of a 12 months old. Is that the point where I say O-M-G???

My son’s developmental delay is 40% – he is at the level of 22 months old. He also has sensory issues, but because he only has 3 months left before he turns 3, he will most likely not get occupational therapy (there is about 2 months wait). Because of the severity of the situation, we are recommended to take a medical test and check for autism as well as hearing.

I have a very active and smart boy living in my house that I can’t understand most of the time. He doesn’t listen to what I say and I can’t handle him well without frustration.

When asking for evaluation I was hoping to hear “He is a very smart boy who needs more parental attention. Spend more time with him”
I got way more than I bargained for. I understand, it’s good I asked for help now, but it still doesn’t make me feel any better. I feel guilty for neglecting him and not spending enough time with him. I work 19 hours a day while my boy keeps trying to get my attention by throwing stuff and destroying things. I work and blog and love doing all of it, but did I lose sight of what is really important? Yet, I fought my family so hard to evaluate my boy because they didn’t think that “the system” can understand my son’s unique personality.

I don’t normally get this personal in my blog mostly because I am trying to be helpful to others and I almost feel bad about spilling all this out into the blogosphere, but I am freaked out and Momma is gotta stay strong.

Comments

  1. Oh hugs, girlfriend!! Don’t blame yourself. Just move forward. If you need to cut back on things, remember that your child is a bigger priority that any of us. We know you love us, but you’ve got to be a mom first!
    Heather @ Not a DIY Life recently posted..Half Marathon Training: Week 8My Profile

  2. I’m so sorry that you’re going through this stress! My daughter has sensory delays, and it is a daily struggle. Best of luck working your way through. If you want a few sensory tips, let me know.

  3. Hugs, don’t be hard on yourself. You know what the issue is and you two can move forward. Best of luck, you are strong and can do this.
    Shannon @Aries_Mommy recently posted..Eating For Fuel and HealthMy Profile

  4. @AndreaEmilien says:

    I am sending 1000 hugs your way! Absolutely do not feel guilty. You are a great Mom and doing what you can. We love you!!
    @AndreaEmilien recently posted..Mamavation MondayMy Profile

  5. *hugs* As a mom it’s VERY easy to feel that you aren’t doing enough. Know that you are a good mom and are doing everything you can to make sure your son is the best that he can be. I know this news is difficult to hear but I’m sure you can work with medical and educational providers to explore great options for him. It’ll all work out.
    Laila @OnlyLaila recently posted..Mamavation Monday – TravelingMy Profile

  6. I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. PLEASE don’t blame yourself. You are a wonderful mother and you are not at FAULT for any developmental delays. I hope you can get more information soon to help set your mind at ease. ((((HUGS))))

  7. Hugs Lena!! I can’t imagine what you’re going through but, please don’t blame yourself!! Stay strong girl, i’m here for you!
    Sarah M recently posted..Mamavation Monday: So Long SickiesMy Profile

  8. First of all – take a deep breath. It’s overwhelming for sure but!!! you are one of the strongest women I know. and one of the most devoted to your family. If you need to take a step back, let me know. Let’s talk about how I can SUPPORT YOU so that you can support your family. There is a solution here – I JUST know it. BIG HUGS!
    Shelley (@momma_oz) recently posted..Starting over… for the millionth time… #mamavation mondayMy Profile

  9. LOTS of hugs coming your way – don’t be soo hard on yourself.. It is HARD to worry soo much about your child and be soo busy with life you wonder if it’s you..,but its NOT! You are a great Mom, and sometimes there are snags on the way. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Stay strong lady!

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