This was supposed to be a good informative topic: How do you pay attention to your marriage while you’re raising a child/children? However, the chatroom got quite and in the whole honesty I couldn’t contribute to the conversation either.
Valerie: Doing things as a family and also making time for date night. We really try to make time for each other each night after the kids have gone to bed – whether it’s 30 min or a few hours it really makes a difference.
Lena: I am really bad with it. I still owe my husband a romantic dinner for his birthday (almost 4 months ago). WOW – I should really not be saying anything about paying attention to marriage
Kathleen: I’m still working on this. Even when the kids are all asleep, my husband and I do different things so it’s hard to find something to do TOGETHER. My suggestion would be the little things, a kiss, a hand squeeze, a shoulder rub as you walk by even. Showing you care in little ways will add up.
Mary: I have a husband? So that’s who that guy is! Just kidding… It is crazy hard to find a balance and it does not help that we co-sleep. One day baby girl will be in her own bed! Until then, we are creative in finding “alone time” but we fail at date nights and I feel the strain. I think we both realize that this time is temporary and our needs can come second – for now. That said, holy crap do we need a weekend alone! A friend of mine, who’s kids are a few years older, will just go into their room for “mommy and daddy time.” As open as I am about some things I don’t think I will ever be that open. Its bad enough my son caught us one night, I don’t think we could afford the therapy on us actually doing it while they are fully conscious.
Emily: My husband is ALWAYS wanting to have date nights, my problems is that I ALWAYS want to be the one to tuck The Boy in at night. I’ve started to let go of that and we’ve been having at least one date night a month. A few weeks ago, we went away overnight and my mom stayed with The Boy. It was awesome to let go of being a mom and connect with my husband. We go to lunch together during the week while The Boy is at school, not as romantic as a dinner, but still a wonderful time together. We even have a date night planned for this Tuesday – Dave Matthews Band!
Ghada: Hmmm…by the crickets in the discussion, I suspect we are all having trouble keeping that balance. To be honest, with 2 kids under 5 paying attention to our marriage is sometimes as simple as having a chat over tea after dinner. Though we are aiming to do date night starting in July at least twice a month.
Mary: Ghada I was thinking the same thing and feel relived that it is not just me, ladies.
WOW – I think we are in need of suggestions. Help?